A Week Fraught with Applications

I'm not quite at the end of my rope but I can see it from here and it's made of red tape. I was asked for nineteen separate documents today that I did not have and now have to scramble around to get. I had the other five.

Paperwork Clusterfuck

Since my last post I've been drowning in a sea of forms and copies and Important Documents. You don't want to hear about it and I don't really want to talk about it, living it has been boring enough. Suffice it to say I've spent eleven dollars faxing things, spent approximately four hours on hold (seriously) and so far I have screamed at a telephone robot about six and one-half times.

The Pendulum Swings!

Last night we all did a "Family Project" they had assigned at my kid's school. The 100th day of the school year is coming up, and everyone has to make a poster with 100 of something on it. Anything. We did "Insect stickers." The boy put two of the insects very close together and then put a heart shaped sticker over them. He said it was because "those two like each other." Awwww.

The cutest goddamn thing I could find
...or the creepiest

Life is like a box of land mines

Got a bill from the insurance company for a prescription they had partially covered, got the same old runaround. Internet says call the number on the card; I don't have the card anymore. I asked some friends who still have that insurance, they told me to look online.

Also got answer from credit report people; Answer was No. They didn't believe I was me online and told me to apply by mail which i did but I did not include sufficient proof of ID. oops. Thank god I didn't give up my license when they asked me to.

In other news the sky looks like a dirty sock on a wet shower floor.

May I see your papers

Friday I finally got into the local Social Security office to get my name changed to my new married name. I had tried to do it right after I got married in October but I just dropped in that day (without an appointment) and waited about 2 hours before I had to leave. So I called ahead next time and made an appointment and printed the application online and got my documents together and really once I got there the whole thing took about four minutes. Score!

But today I went to the courthouse to get my new driver's license and they said no problem just give us yer old one and I asked if I did that how would I prove to the people at the bank, for instance, that I was who I said I used to be? They asked if ah knew anyone at mah bank real good. I do not; banking is just a professional relationship to me. They didn't know whut ta tell me. Burn.
I guess I'll try changing everything else first?

Really though, without the whole ear tubes thing from earlier, that could have been an even break. Keep hope alive!

Ear tubes

(Note: This post is too long. And not funny. Maybe just skip it. Unless you had a really horrible day because they didn't have the creamer you like at the convenience store. If that sounds like you, read on. Suck my life.)

Today I took my five year old son to an ear specialist because he's been having recurring ear infections since he was about three. He has some hearing loss in both ears but the doctors say it is probably not permanent. They want to put tubes in his ears to aid drainage and say he should feel better immediately.

I have taken him to his pediatrician five times since September. I wish the man had recommended the specialist before this. I don't know why he didn't, unless it's because I don't have any medical insurance.

When I moved here three years ago, and up until three months ago, I did have but they never paid any of my son's bills because they didn't have a copy of his birth certificate (and I guess I had to prove he was actually mine to get him on my policy). I faxed one but it was unfaxable because it was on the kind of paper that doesn't photocopy. When I found out about that I went to their offices and hand delivered the original birth certificate (which cost me $25 and a day of missed work to get) with a note attached saying it couldn't be scanned and to please return it when they had the information they needed, as it was my only copy. I called them weeks later after not having heard anything more about it, just to make sure it was taken care of. It wasn't. They had scanned it into their system, and, of course, it couldn't be read. Or returned, for some reason.

So I called the state registrar and explained my situation to a few different people before they connected me with someone who said she had heard of this situation before, and recommended that I order a specific "Long form" certified copy, which she explained would be photocopiable and scannable and faxable and so I did. And it was. But the bills still aren't paid.

That might be because I didn't find out about this situation until I called the pediatrician to schedule an appointment for my kid's pre-kindergarten physical, without which they would not have let him into school. I made the appointment and got a call back about two minutes later saying they wouldn't be able to see him until I paid a bill from the previous year. This was the first I had heard about it. I had to pay $300 to get him in, and I had to borrow that. Since it took me about two months to settle the situation when it finally came to my attention, I think I might be somehow past some kind of claim-filing deadline, and am pretty much screwed. Which is doubly awesome because the doctor also gives a big discount for people who have no insurance (or at least know they don't have any insurance). I also missed several hours of work, spaced out over this period, so that I could deal with the situation during actual business hours. Since I was working 7am - 6pm at the time, I really had no other option.

I am the unluckiest person ever to somehow have internet access. If you are reading this on a computer and not through your neighbor's window, your life is better than mine.

Also, I am changing pediatricians.

Your life is better than mine.

Hi and welcome to my blog. I hope it makes you feel better about yourself.